Where are all the Teens? Pt. 1 Question for the Adults

Parents, Lay Leaders, Faith Peeps....Where are all the teens? 

Where are all the teens? As a ministry team we are always called to outreach as well as supporting the teens that show up and share in youth ministry regularly. We think about how we can be where the teens are simultaneously meeting our safe environment requirements. We go to ball games, talk to the teens at the grocery store and out and about. 

Recently, I was at a women's retreat as a retreatant, excited to receive ministry and enjoy some much needed rest. I had several encounters with Christ that were amazing, even though I was hoping to only receive I was called to minister, and I was humbled in convictions about how to fall more deeply in love with Jesus and commit to living out my "commission". Many of the women on retreat had small children, but some I was delighted to hear had teens.

 For some time I had been racking my brain; why, in this community where we are actively working to invite the teens within all the parameters we are given (i.e. one public announcement at Mass a month, a small line in the bulletin, an invitation to the soon to be confirmed in confirmation class). All of these are beautiful blessings by the way, but they are NOT ENOUGH. In conversation I began to realize that one reason we are not seeing "growth" may be that parents and teens think that Youth Ministry is for teens that are "in need" of catechesis. When I asked one of the mothers why her high schooler hadn't been to our events she said that there was a leader in their church that was great and that she has been really involving them in that Mass and that her child was "happy" in his Catholicism. The leader who has taken initiative to encourage Teen involvement in the Mass should be commended, but....I wonder if some of this leads to the assumption that only teens who are experiencing faith crisis, teens who are needy, or unhappy need youth ministry. I failed in the moment to open a dialogue with this person to really reveal how valuable the ministry is for ALL teens; the shiny "happy in their Catholicism" AND the teens who have burdened hearts, questions, challenges are welcome and NEED and DESERVE youth ministry. But my wit was broken or it wasn't God's will that I should share more with her at that time. 

 I began to feel, isn't it ironic that someone who took the time to seek out a faith sharing, catechizing, fellowship filled weekend would feel what their teen was getting is enough to sometimes help out in the Mass? It is true that meeting Jesus in the celebration of the Mass is absolutely necessary and critical for us as Catholics in receiving grace and the true life gift of Jesus. It is a command to receive the amazing gift He gives in his divine presence in the Eucharist. But in the great commission to us all, he did not say, "Do this and if nothing else... that's fine as long as you're happy." 

Being a disciple is more than going to Mass, it is being nourished, fortified for the mission, the battle.  

When preparing for the battle there is a long set of procedures, analysis, training, and readying that must take place before charging ahead. A commander would be derelict if he sent soldiers into battle because they SAID they were ready and enthusiastic without properly equipping them. He also is responsible for making sure that there are enough people to properly execute the mission (someone to watch your back and I you). It is true that in ministry, making sure that we have numbers is an administrative and quantifiable strategy to analyze an organizations effectiveness. But it's more than that.
It is about increasing the number of this world's young people who are being sanctified. It's owning the understanding that faith formation and KNOWING Jesus require prayer, time, encounters, and education. We are every day in a battle against evil, don't let yourself or your teens be beguiled into believing that being happy is all that is needed to be a disciple. Discipleship is a verb, not a noun.

Youth are inundated with information and data and as Bishop Barron reminds us are being more effectively argued out of the church more rapidly than ever before, our youth are part of the crisis of the "nones". In my humble opinion Youth ministry is most effective a safe haven for the independent teen who  can freely question, explore, learn and have fellowship with other teens and adults who "have their back" These teens are the soldiers who share the witness of Christ's victory here on Earth.

This woman I spoke to saw the immense value in taking time to receive sacramental support in the forms of Adoration, Mass, Reconciliation and more. She benefited from catechesis and support from those who taught through experience, wisdom, scripture and creativity. She enjoyed quiet reflection and prayer as well as much needed faith sharing and fellowship. If I could go back to that moment, I would say to her..."You are so wise to have made this time for yourself! I wonder if you received sustenance in this faith journey and if knowing how valuable it is to strengthening your discipleship if you would ever say that it would have been fine to just be complacent in what you were doing before? Or if you are convicted by the training, more ready for the battle, more filled with the love and mercy of Christ wouldn't you want the same for your teen?" I can't go back in time and say what she and her teen deserved to hear, but right now I will say that I am so blessed that God chooses me to be a part of this faith, and this ministry and I invite you as parents, ministers, adults in the faith to encourage your teens to follow your example because if you are following CHRIST's example, only then can we receive the peace He wants to give. Be happy in your catholic faith, AND "do whatever he tells you"(John 2:5) "GO make disciples"(Matthew 28:19-20)